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Robert and fiance
Photo courtesy Robert Fenbers
Robert Fenbers and his fiance, Ashley.

What a difference a month can make

Editor’s Note: Robert Fenbers is a student enrolled in Dr. Leo Jeffres’s Specialized Writing class.

As I awoke on March 4, I was completely stricken with nerves as I had finally made the decision to ask Ashley to marry me. Everything felt so right. The moment, the weather, and just the way the month had gone so far. It went off without a hitch as I secretly gathered the family and our four pups at the rescue center in Akron to surprise her.

It feels like a year ago…

I remember watching college basketball that night. It was comforting, and little did I know it was one of the last games I’d see for a while as the sports world would soon become one of the first U.S. casualties of the pandemic.

It was a long day. We went out to Ashley’s uncle’s restaurant to celebrate and then also ended the night at a packed Topgolf with some family members. It was four months of planning that had turned to pure joy and I was loving every minute of it while enjoying some of my favorite appetizers with good company.

I was bombarded with stress at the time. School work, sports writing coverage and countless hours at Topgolf paying for her diamond ring. So many hours I spent at a location that holds up to 250 people on each of its three floors. Germs never really crossed my mind. All the clubs being touched, guests sticking their hands on the food and then touching the clubs once again. Now I get nauseated just thinking about it, but not at the time.

Then, on March 15, Gov. Mike DeWine shut down all restaurants and bars. It was like something out of a movie. I had heard about the coronavirus and what it was becoming, but I never thought it would do this. In addition to the restaurant closures, all of my sports coverage had been canceled for the two newspapers for which I worked.   

 It was shocking and surreal. I once touted three jobs, and in matter of moments I had none.

I went through the stages of grief. There was enjoyment of having every day off, there was worry about what was going to come next and then there was fear about catching the virus, or a family member coming down with it.

Now, a month later, nothing feels normal.  There are no sports. No restaurants. It’s just a repetitive routine of get up, do schoolwork, do some housework, take some family time, then go to bed. I honestly don’t know what day it is on some occasions.

Thoughts about wedding plans have been put on hold, honeymoon – or any travel really – has been moved to the back burner. It seems like we hit a pause button in our lives.  Nothing’s quite the same anymore. It’s quite maddening, but at least Ashley said yes for when our future begins again.